I just spent my weekend with 2 flower girls for the wedding and we didn’t come up with anything suitable for both girls.
My flower girls are actually 70-80% well behaved as far as children go. However, I took an older family member who played up worse than the kids.
- Mrs Older – Whined the whole time for food, for coffee, took the Older one to the “baby” section and Younger was playing up “because she didn’t like what Mrs Older wanted”…kind of not accepting that children do eventually grow up. Mrs Older is also the one who is infamously kicking up a stink over Ave fucking Maria as well.
I have two flower girls for the wedding – but they both aren’t doing “traditional” flower girl duties… one will be a flower girl and the other one will be carrying our rings. I didn’t like being forced into selecting a “younger bridesmaid” as I associate them with older girls/adults:
- Miss Younger – doesn’t really like weddings.
- Miss Older – Tween.
I personally thought children would be EASIER than bridesmaids! I was soooooooooo wrong.
Bridesmaids (well mine are) all have opinions about what they will wear and what they won’t wear. My bridesmaids (SO’s family members) were really easy going about the process. I think the ONLY disagreement (and it wasn’t even an argument – it was “I don’t like this” notice in advance) was about what colours they wouldn’t wear and what price they would spend on the dresses. Eventually, with consulting the ladies, I ended up getting what I originally wanted in the sizes and the price range the ladies wanted. I think we ended up compromising on the original colours because I wasn’t keen on a “pastel” wedding and my wedding isn’t “pastel” at all.
With kids, they have parents to tell/guide them into doing what is needed. Kids like getting attention at weddings and it would be ok to include them in the wedding party. At least with adult bridesmaids you can all get drunk or talk about adult stuff…but children are a bit more work required. You can’t swear in front of them for a start (don’t want to be a bad influence now!) and you can’t make them do anything now days – including wearing clothes for your wedding. Children should be malleable and you can tell naughty kids that “you’re an adult” and they kind of (begrungingly) do what you want.
I do have to say, the flower girls were both pretty good in terms of doing what was needed for the wedding. They both have different personalities which makes dealing with both at the same time a bit harder – you don’t want to baby Miss Older but Miss Younger needs to be guided towards what you need for a wedding.
Despite hating the children’s wear section, which was mainly baby and boy orientated, Miss Younger was a bit easier to find stuff. In order to make the whole process less painful, as Mrs Older was demanding food or coffee and then changing her mind every fucking minute when presented with lunch options…and then in the middle of buying my wedding dress was complaining in front of the shop’s designer… it was infuriating and I really had a bad headache and no patience for childish demanding.
Poor Miss Older was so hard to get anything for and Miss Younger was fucking around/whining about dresses a fair bit. Younger wouldn’t say what she liked to wear and Older was being embarrassed by Mrs Older. Mrs Older hated it when Miss Older and I (had to go collect my wedding dress) and Miss Older wanted to have a look at some of the dresses on display. When I heard fashion designers talking about Miss Older – those proportions which girls inspire to have – they are tween sizing! So a lady who wants to be a size 4-6 here (like actually wants to attain that look blah blah)…it’s kind of scary that’s what they want rather than accepting a ‘bigger’ size or just accepting the body they got (like me… I have curves…not “fat” or “plus sized” but I certainly wouldn’t be doing catwalks anytime soon).
At the end of the day, my headache was sooooo bad and Mrs Older’s whinging was really wearing me out – as much as Mrs Older can be nice, she really does my fucking nut in sometimes with these comments and lack of awareness about how she comes across – I thought some of it was embarassing like being rude to shop assistants or making rude comments in front of the Misses (especially about my wedding decisions). Because of the whinging, I suggested to SO we keep Mrs Older busy with minor wedding tasks and don’t let her do too much damage at the wedding with speaking roles.