Walking Down the Aisle – Alternatives When You Don’t Have Parent/s at Your Wedding

One common question people have been asking me about is “who will be walking me down the aisle”.  

While I personally incorporated some traditional aspects for our wedding, being walked down the aisle by someone (like a male family member) was something I explicitly didn’t want from day one. To me, it’s not my cup of tea.

Even if tradition was hoisted upon me (and people have tried it on with some aspects of our wedding)…Considering my poor relations with my parents (and their pre-wedding behaviour) I never dreamed of asking them to do the walking – even if the relations had improved. It’s been four months since I’ve heard from them after the wedding-guest-list dummy spit.

On both sides of the family (in-laws and my family) – there was a bit of surprise about my refusal to select someone to “walk down the aisle” with.  Like the white wedding dress (“oh you HAVE to have one” and every (wo)man and their dog had an opinion on that) While most people who are aware of my parents, and their long history of bad behaviour, completely agree they would have been a poor choice – I think some family members seem to think I want to be walked down the aisle with someone. I really don’t!

The concept of “being given away” is really feudal and makes me feel like a piece of property.  Which I’m not.

My significant other doesn’t treat me like a piece of property but the concept is degrading. Maybe in medieval times; that the daughter WAS considered a piece of property. But today, having to walk with someone in the family, doesn’t really feel right for all situations. If there are other brides who want to walk with their parents; they probably have a good relationship and that’s their right to have/not have the parent give them away.

I think other alternatives for ladies in the same boat as me could/should consider:

  • Children

  • Flower girls

  • Bridesmaids

  • Pets

  • Mother

  • Sister/s

  • Brother/s

  • Other family members you have a relation to

  • Step parent

  • More than one person to walk down the aisle with


Long winded answer: Even before my parents decided (were uninvited) not to come to the wedding – I wanted to walk down with the bridal party.